Death Predictor!

http://evil.berzerker.net/death_predictions.php

Hayley: At age 54 a truly fanatic fan of your spoken word works will stalk you and torture you for a period of weeks. After refusing to sign any more autographs, the fan will kill you

Ben: At age 51 you will participate in the newest reality game show. Contestants battle each other in an arena with swords and spears. You will have a good run (12+ victories) but eventually be killed, much to the audience's dismay.

mine say 78 i wil have heart attack from peanut butter an banana sandwhich funny i dont eat bread or peanut butter like my banana

Celeste: At age 71 while showing your work at a major art gallery, you will be accosted and later slain by PETA activists.

Hehe.. very amusing! (i didn't even know i had an artistic side!)

Whats accosted and who are PETA!! LEMME AT EM!!!!!

hhahaha you'll be dead at 51 so u wont b there!

I'll kill em before they get a chance to age!

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals

Mine

David: At age 66 you will be attacked by a pack of escaped lap dogs in your neighborhood and never be seen again.

Ahhhhh my worst nightmare!!!

your artwork must be pretty disturbing then!! probably slaughtered animals

BAH, humans are animals too! So why kill them? Isn't that hypocritical?



I dreamt about that happening to me when i was a kid!!!

Tough luck bro!

At age 49 a meteorite will strike you as you are walking to the gas station to buy a 40oz bottle of King Cobra.

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!

Jesus...

Emma: At age 36 you will take a near lethal dose of mescaline, wander the desert for six months, and eventually be eaten by coyotes.


I've only got 11 years to go!

omg!! hahaha fear and loathing style

Anastasia: At age 42 you will be hunted by a strange apparition resembling Andy Griffith, and subsequently commit suicide after the stress proves to be too much.

Chris : At age 50 you will pass in your sleep from undiscerned natural causes. Unfortunately you will be sleeping nude in a local shopping mall.


COOL!!!!

At age 44 your head will explode after being exposed to Britney Spears for thirty-six consecutive hours!

HAHA!!

Paulie: At age 52 you will be gunned down in the street by hippies after enacting a bill that grants the WTO even more power


DAMN HIPPIES ......WITH............GUNS AARRRRRRGHHHH

Michael: At age 55 you will realize that you actually died three years earlier, and have been dreaming all the events since then.

Nigel: At age 36 a group of children will text message you continuously for three years, eventually distracting you while driving and causing a fatal wreck; your fatal wreck.

welp 12 yrs... maybe ill thro this mobile phone thing away for a good dosin years lol

At age 31 a tiger will maul you. Don't ask why, but you will be in a Burmese jungle

Makes sense to me

Bek: At age 30 you will start sleeping more and more. After six months of this you will be sleeping 19 hours a day. By month seven, you do not wake up anymore. You cease breathing during month nine.

hey this is weird. kinda makes sense cuz i sleep so much n e way.. only 9 more years to go..

Tash: At age 52 while playing Street Fighter Omega at an arcade, you will be electrocuted by the headset. You will be the first such death in years.


i got a sucky death!!


so i did it again

Tash: At age 55 your prototype flying machine will work, and while aloft on its maiden voyage a passenger jet will take you into it's jet engine, and throw you out as a mist.

woohoo i made a flying machine

jason: At age 59 a large monkey will beat you to death, using the antiquated art of fisticuffs.

Marcia: At age 53 you will die fighting the Interplanetary War on Terrorism on Camp Harmony, Venus.

Sharan: At age 57 a large monkey will beat you to death, using the antiquated art of fisticuffs.


BRING IT ON BANANA BREATH....I'LL HAVE YA

Makes me wonder where my life is leading to for me to wind up in this situation....


what a way to go


I'll try and kill him for ya first Jase....bloody violent monkeys...they're everywhere!!!

Abbey: At age 46 you will refuse to give a quarter to a beggar. Immediately afterwards you will be hit by a bus.

Ha i always refuce to do that tho!!! hmm better start now i guess....or karma will get me!

Royston : At age 76 you will refuse to give a quarter to a beggar. Immediately afterwards you will be hit by a bus.


Remind me not to Insult Beggers!!!

Hehe.. so now that you have two predictions you'll have to keep a look out for which one it is!

(haha Street Fighter Omega... Oldskool never dies)





You stingy buggers! haha

LoL

simon: At age 71 you will be hit by a train while napping on the railroad tracks.



well that all..... makes sence now bbbahahahah

Hmmmmm... I got the same as TASH!!
DODGY!!... Unless we are at the same arcade playing the same game... ohhhhh

Rach: At age 52 while playing Street Fighter Omega at an arcade, you will be electrocuted by the headset. You will be the first such death in years.

"Kosta Bezmylov: At age 42 you will take a near lethal dose of mescaline, wander the desert for six months, and eventually be eaten by coyotes. "

I fraking love it!

Calvin: At age 29 you will die in a fiery golf-cart crash, alcohol will be involved

hmmm.. not long to go

DJ NIGGA: At age 67 you will be shanked in prison, becoming fatally wounded.

oi guys check this out

Daana Aaron Te Rata Pou: At age 58 you will be shanked in prison, becoming fatally wounded.

...i'm f**ked rofl

i'm changing my name to dog booby
Dog booby: At age 63 you will die from a lethal overdose of methamphetamines.

ha ha ha

we got so jipped.....i wanted a better death

and to make it worse, we are gonna end up with our hair all static and messy from electrocution.....not gonna look pretty for the after life *sulks*

Matt: At age 60 you will die fighting the Interplanetary War on Terrorism on Phobos, a moon of Mars.

lmao...i love it...spectacular, enterprising and completely fabricated...just what i look for in my death... still, 4 decades to go, no rush, see you all on phobos!

Shen: At age 51 you will drown in a wading pool under mysterious circumstances. The only clue will be a small blue pacifier found around your neck.

as IF!!
not long to go

at least i'll be sucking on something

Lucy: At age 59 aliens will abduct you and use your body for sick and often anally-oriented experiments before dropping you off outside of a local homeless shelter smelling of beer.

Riiight

Tini: At age 35 you will become lost during a road trip and wind up living out the movie "Wrong Turn". Sorry for ya.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Michelle: At age 35 you will realize that you actually died three years earlier, and have been dreaming all the events since then.


tee hee hee... only 5 more years of having to put up with you lot - awesome!!!!

spooky!!!!